19 December 2009

Cherish Every Moment!

Nothing has given me more perspective on how quickly children grow up, than being the mother of a fifteen year old, and an unborn baby!

It is easy to be so pre-occupied by taking care of all our children’s needs and getting caught up in all their demands that we forget this time will pass so quickly! Before long they will be young adults, starting to test their little wings, preparing themselves for leaving the nest.

There is also the reality of, as they grow up, we as parents will face moments where we will not be able to take care of all their needs anymore. When CJ was just a little boy I once read, “When our children are small they have many needs, but easy to solve; as they grow older they will have less needs, but more difficult to solve.”

This past week I fully experienced this quote! CJ took part in the Junior Show jumping Championships, over five days. From the start things did not quite go as we expected. On day one, CJ got a cramp in his calf, at the second jump; he could not control Silverball, who had his eye on the wrong jump. Silverball stopped right in front of the jump

and since CJ could not hold on with his legs (due to the cramp), he fell off in the jump. He immediately got up, but was holding one of the poles in his hand and only a few seconds later, realized that he was still holding the pole in his hand. He slowly put it down, took Silverball by his rains and led him out of the arena.

Never before have I seen my son in so much shock and disappointment. Shock, because he really got a fright when his calf went into a cramp, losing control over his horse, while approaching the jump, knowing he was going to fall! Disappointment, since he was not able to finish the course after the fall and got eliminated for the day. He was looking forward to take on the challenge of jumping the course so much, and within seconds it was over and there was nothing he could do about it. My pain was beyond what I had ever experienced before, since I couldn’t do anything about my son’s disappointment. Everything in me cried out to run towards my him and to hold him, telling him everything is okay, and that he would have another chance the next day. But my son is fifteen years old; I couldn’t pick him up anymore and it wasn’t okay, it was very important. All I could do was to pray, asking God to give me self-control and peace, giving CJ acceptance in this very painful situation.

On the second day Silverball just ran into the first jump. Amazingly, the Judge approached him and gave him permission to start the course over. If he finished the first eight jumps without any faults, he could continue to the next eight jumps. The second chance was much better, but Silverball refused one jump and he had to stop after the eighth jump. CJ wasn’t so disappointed this time; he had the opportunity to jump a part of the course.

An experienced horse owner mention that by the way Silverball held his head as he went over a jump, it was possible that his back was in serious pain and for that reason refused the jump also. Silverball is nineteen years old, not at all a young horse any more. Taking into account his performance with CJ over the past year, he was taking strain! Later the day, a horse physiotherapist confirmed the painful back. They immediately started treatment, painkillers and Christo and CJ gave Silverball supplements.

They weren’t due for jumping until the fourth day and that gave Silverball a day off and a chance to recover. On the fourth day Silverball looked much better. CJ also was taking huge amounts of water with Concentrace minerals and cell food to avoid cramps in the heat. I was praying night and day. I saw a new Christian slogan the other day – P U S H – Pray Until Something Happens. That was the only thing I could do, and I did!

It was a good day! They had a clear round and CJ finished 10th out of 35 contestants. There was a lift in the atmosphere and I could only praise the Lord for granting my son this victory!

Unfortunately on the morning of the fifth day, Silverball was even worse than on the second day. The horse Physiotherapist diagnosed knee problems on the fourth day and they put “Ice Man” on the knee. As CJ went to fetch Silverball from the stable, to put him in the horse box, he found Silverball with a huge swollen knee, due to an allergic reaction to “Ice Man”. They immediately got the Vet and he declared Silverball ‘sound’ to jump – it was only a skin reaction, but Christo still SMS (text) me to urgently pray – it didn’t look good. For an hour I was praying scriptures, calling out to the Lord through my favourite Ps 37.

Still Silverball was not up to the course. For the first time since CJ jumped with Silverball he kicked off a pole and he refused another jump. For CJ the championship was over.

So many emotions were experienced – the expectations that weren’t reached, the concern about Silverball, the fear that this may be the end of Silverball’s career… It was so beautiful, but also painful to watch the video clip Josua took while CJ jumped on the fifth day and see how CJ still patted Silverball with approval, when they walked out of the arena, although they didn’t have victory! He loves Silverball so much. Silverball was his first horse, the horse that gave everything to show CJ’s talent for horse riding and –jumping.

In the midst of all this I’ve started to experience serious contractions! It must be due to the stress. For a moment I was just so exhausted of being in the spiritual war, experiencing my son’s pain and concern about his horse and worrying about the future that I didn’t mind if I went into labour with our unborn baby, even weeks before the due date. Then this morning, as baby was stretching and moving and I looked down on my tummy, it dawned on me – I must cherish every moment with EVERY child!

I must cherish this unborn baby in my tummy! I must take care of him or her to the best of my ability. I must enjoy the little movements, before long he or she is born, and I will not have these special moments of feeling baby’s movements inside of me. How amazing to carry a human being inside my body!

I must cherish my 18 months old baby Daniel, who, within a few weeks, won’t be my baby anymore! The moment a newborn arrives, the baby isn’t the baby anymore. I will cherish his soft baby-like body, the way he lays next to me in bed. The way he calls me ‘Mommy”.

I must cherish my six year old Danika. The little girl who is quickly growing out of her toddler stage into a girl. I will make mental notes of the look in her eyes as she adores me when I put on my make-up and she wish she could be grown up already. Not long and she will be a young woman, spreading her wings into adulthood!

I must especially cherish the last few years with my eldest son, under my roof. He is now a young man who is quickly growing into adulthood, already experiencing the hardships of life – not a child anymore!

When my baby cries I can quickly pick him up, take care of his needs. Taking care of my little ones’ needs, are more than I can count in a day, but they are easy to solve. When the young man, I call my son, is silently crying, there isn’t much I can do about it. These moments are rare, but not easy to solve. I can only take it to my Heavenly Father, trusting He will take care of it, in His good timing. Then there is one other thing I can do –I can unconditionally love him - because I’ve cherished special moments over the last fifteen years!

I haven’t allowed other things to take my focus away from my children. It is so easy when other things take our focus away from our children and motherhood that we harden our hearts towards our children and we believe the lie - they are only a nuisance, keeping us from real life, dreading every stage of their life.

Dear mother, sharing our time with our children and cherishing memory making moments, is real life! Don’t allow the enemy to kill, steal and destroy special moments with your children, by wishing they will pass a certain stage. Every stage has its challenges, look out for the special moments in every stage. Before long they will be grown up and only the special moments you have cherished, will make life worth while.


Huisvrou said...

Net weereens Baie Dankie.
Vader gebruik jou baie meer as wat jy besef.

CJ - dink aan jou. Mag Silverball se gesondheid vinnig en deeglik herstel. En mag Vader ook daarin voorsien - sou jy 'n nuwe een moet vind... Die lewe is nie altyd maklik nie, maar groei vind ook nie net in gunstige omstandighede plaas nie.

Linnie said...

Liewe Marelize
Groei vind juis plaas buite ons gemak zone, ne?
Gese├źnde tyd vir jou en jou gesin!

Petra said...

AMEN! I think you should regularly re-publish the first 3 and last 2 paragraphs as a constant reminder to us all!
Thank you my friend for lovingly reminding me and encouraging me in this wonderfully blessed calling of motherhood, never-mind their ages or our circumstances!

Anonymous said...

Could you please pray for me. I find it so hard to cherish my children in the midst of marriage problems etc. I think my 3 precious blessings know I resent them. I always want to do someting else and want them to leave me alone. For years I've felt that they are a burden although I love them so much. We're so easily deceived and it took this blog to open my eyes.

Blog Widget by LinkWithin