I recently read this article which is by far the most helpful article I've ever read on the subject of 'speak gently'!
"Not many of us possess the natural ability to command our own emotions and thereby bring peace to a factious situation. The issue that concerns many of us as mothers is our tendency to raise our voices and become angry with our children. It causes us concern, shame, even heart-felt sadness.I believe that the root of what causes us to blow up and resort to anger when attempting to get control of a situation or a child is rooted in insecurity.Sometimes, not wanting to be bothered by them, we choose to please ourselves when our children get in the way of our immediate interests--whether it be talking on the phone, going out with friends, crafting, computer time, or even getting some needed sleep (as mothers we know this is often a luxury, don't we?).After a season of neglecting to correct with confidence and finality, our children become the typical, out-of-control youngsters that cause us to lose control.Common fear and worry are also some of the obvious sources of anger we extend to our children. Money, relationship, and health concerns can cause us to tense up and react to those around us. It is at these times that we not only raise our voices, but also use expletives to punctuate our points. Like Cain, we give in to a frustrated spirit which leads to devastating results.Outside pressure can also cause us to errupt in many instances.I am reminded here of how in the animal kingdom--mothers react negatively to prying eyes. These creatures must have privacy in order to care for their little ones. It is sad that we have been deceived to believe that we need some sort of "village" in order to raise human babies. Every new expectant mother soon learns of the many "opinions" that exist in society regarding child rearing, as she receives unsolicited input from a myriad of "experts". It can be overwhelming. Then, after the baby is born, she hears the noise of all these voices rushing in to confuse her.Comparing ourselves with others will also lead us to react.Being thankful and content will go a long way towards helping us become the mothers of our dreams, and having well-behaved children. We need to appreciate our circumstances, our husbands, and even ourselves for who they (we) are, and allow God to feed, nurture and provide for our needs, even though all we have to work with are a few fish and loaves.This is why our relationship with God must be our anchor.In summary, we simply need to get out of the habit of raising our voices."
Read Sherry’s whole article and how to break the habit of raising our voices, here. I’ve already read it three times in a row, I’ve put it into practice today and I’m going to bed tonight with a peaceful heart!