22 January 2009

Well done, good and faithful servant

The tiredness is starting to build up. The days are packed with activities. CJ is now working separately from Heidi-Mari and Josua. And since the beginning of this year we are actively busy with the little ones too. Danika, Andrew and David are doing their studies through Lapbooking. Daniel is starting to sleep less at night - all my babies' sleeping patterns change when they turn 6months. Their normal once a night feed turns into 4-5 times a night. That doesn't make it easy on Mom's emotions!

Today we planned to wrap up CJ's Poetry Mini Book for LLATL, and he wanted me to check it before putting the final product together. Heidi-Mari and Josua haven't had a Konos fun day since the year started and we put today aside for that.

We planned to do Danika, Andrew and David's colour lapbooking this afternoon and hoped they would be able to play in the sandpit while we are busy in the morning.

Daniel is currently in the pattern of sleeping at least 90min in the mornings and we counted on that to make the morning a success.

Everything went according to plan. We took Andrew and David to the sandpit with aeroplanes, cars and animals to play with. Then I went to put Daniel to sleep while CJ, Heidi-Mari and Josua prepared for their activities.

While I was putting Daniel to sleep I remembered that Christo and the boys were going camping this weekend and I still had to do some laundry before then. I realised this could potentially interrupt the well planned morning. I can so easily get distracted by activities, and then struggle to focus again!

As soon as Daniel was asleep, I grabbed the laundry basket, to discover with shock that there were at least 3 bundles of laundry! I would just start doing it inbetween the fun. I quickly peeked in at CJ and gave him some suggestions and praise. Now we could start with the fun. Heidi-Mari and Josua are doing the Muscular System (of the Human Body) and today we're going to make faces and draw pictures illustrating which muscles do the work. For that I got the camera ready to take some pictures.

Danika was drawing next to us and we had a good laugh at all the silly faces Josua could pull.

Then reality struck.....

Andrew and David started fighting about the same aeroplane, the orange one! I ran outside to sort it out, and as I ran past the scullery remembered the laundry. I quickly popped in the second bundle and decided we would put the first bundle on the line when we took a break. Before I could reach Heidi-Mari and Josua (they were waiting for me to help them trace the outline of a face so they could draw the muscles), I heard Danika crying. She had tripped over something and hurt her knee. I quickly stopped by and gave the necessary tender, loving, care. Back to Heidi-Mari and Josua, only to hear Heidi-Mari announce Daniel was awake.

This is where I realised it is down-hill for the day. The morning was too short - as usual. It was almost 12 o'clock and there was so much more fun to do. But the little ones needed lunch by 12h30 to keep their blood sugar levels normal, and this afternoon was Christo and my coffee date. In the next hour, we had to wrap up the Konos fun, had to prepare lunch, I had to get dressed, Daniel had to be breastfed and needed a dry nappy and clean clothes. I also realised there was still one bundle of laundry to be done and it was the bundle with CJ's horse riding pants, which he need by 16h00 this afternoon. I wasn't even sure if there would be enough time for it to dry on the line. On top of it the little ones were by now starting to get cranky. David had a dirty nappy (only I am allowed - or have the stomach - to change a dirty nappy). Time was running out, and it felt like I was spinning out of control. A feeling I'm used to in situations like this, knowing that I alone am not enough for all this.

By 13h10 Daniel and I jumped into the car. The babysitter had arrived on time (thank you Lord!), everyone had lunch (except me - no time) but Daniel's tummy was full and his bum was dry. I was exhausted and fled defeated. How many days would end like this? I have all the expectations of a great fun day and at the end the little foxes like sibling quarrels, crying toddlers and injuries take up our time and we have to settle for 'trying again tomorrow'.
For a moment I allowed myself to lean back and try to figure out what had happened the last 3 hours. I actually cried out to the Lord. Adrenaline was pumping through my veins and I felt like hyperventilating. Lord help me!! I don't now how to do this. Was this really going to be the pattern of my days ahead? What am I doing wrong? (I'm not a very organised person - could that be the reason?) For a split second I questioned my motives for homeschooling my 7 children. Was it all worth it? Are my children actually benefitting from this .... chaos?

And then I heard the soft voice of the Lord in my spirit: "My daughter you are in My perfect will. This is the reason I created you, you are doing it for Me. You bring Me glory through receiving all the children I wanted to give you and raising them up in My ways. Right now you don't have the full picture. You will only have the full picture in Eternity. Then I will show you what I have accomplished through you and your children for Myself and My glory. This is not about you, it is about the purpose I have for you and my children.

Take courage, my daughter, I will reward you One Day. Keep on keeping on. I do know the sacrifices you are making in raising a Godly generation. I do know your tiredness and frustrations, but this is a very special time of your life. This is My calling for your life. Be faithful and in due time you will reap the fruit of your obedience."

I could feel His peace settling in my heart. I could look back at the morning and have hope and joy in my heart. This is worth it. I could remember the pride in CJ's posture when he showed me his Poetry Minibook, I could remember Heidi-Mari's remark, 'the Muscle system is such fun Mom', I could remember Josua's shyish laugh when he saw the pictures of his silly faces,

I could remember my two toddler boys' laughs of joy in the wet sandpit;

I could remember Danika's thankfulness after I'd kissed her injured knee, I could remember little Daniel's sleepy face against my breast.

I don't want anything different in my life. This is the precious time. I will keep on keeping on.

Tomorrow I will start again, love my children, train my children and have fun.

I will also take every challenge that comes my way, for one day in Eternity I will bow before my Lord and hear the words: Well done, good and faithful servant, Enter into the joy of your lord.’ (Matt 25:23)


Huisvrou said...

Ek kan my jou dag so goed voorstel... Want ek beleef hulle gereeld - ergste van als is net dat ek so bederfde dogter is met 'n SpeedQueen wasmasjien en tuimeldroƫr, 'n skottelgoedwasser en 'n bediende 5 en 'n halfdag elke week.

Ek het egter nog soveel vrae, soveel dinge wat my bang maak op hierdie nuwe pad. Maar tyd sal raad en antwoorde bring.
Liefde Marelize

Wilma Gray said...

This is indeed the most precious time.....thanks for sharing.

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